Amanda Bynes is finally talking about some of her bizarre actions over the years, and people cannot handle their emotions on it.
Bynes was on the cover of Paper’s “Break the Internet” issue, and the former child star did not hold back about revealing her issues.
The 32 year old is 4 years sober and is currently enrolled at Los Angeles’ Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandise.
Bynes revealed that in the past, she has experimented heavily with drugs and first started smoking marijuana at the age of 16.
She said, “Everybody is different, obviously, but for me, the mixture of marijuana and whatever other drugs and sometimes drinking really messed up my brain. I actually am a nice person. I would never feel, say or do any of the things that I did and said to the people I hurt on Twitter.”
She added, “There are gateway drugs and thankfully I never did heroin or meth or anything like that but certain things that you think are harmless, they may actually affect you in a more harmful way.”
Bynes also revealed that right after She’s The Man came out, she had an interesting experience.
She said, “When the movie came out and I saw it, I went into a deep depression for 4-6 months because I didn’t like how I looked when I was a boy. I’ve never told anyone that.”
After that Bynes worked on Hairspray with John Travolta and Zac Efron, and followed that up with Hall Pass.
While filming the latter in 2010, Adderall prevented her from being productive on set. She could not remember her lines and disliked her appearance.
Reports later said that she was fired, but Bynes said she simply parted ways, saying, “I did leave…it was definitely completely unprofessional of me to walk off and leave them stranded when they’d spent so much money on a set and crew and camera equipment and everything.”
Bynes also revealed that her more confusing tweets are something she takes responsibility for and is ashamed about.
She said, “I’m really ashamed and embarrassed with the things I said. I can’t turn back time but if I could, I would. And I’m so sorry to whoever I hurt and whoever I lied about because it truly eats away at me.”
She added, “Everything I worked my whole life to achieve, I kind of ruined it all through Twitter. It’s definitely not Twitter’s fault—it’s my own fault.”
Bynes blamed most of her bizarre actions on drug usage, saying, “Truly, for me, [my behavior] was drug-induced, and whenever I got off of [drugs], I was always back to normal.”
She also said, “It definitely isn’t fun when people diagnose you with what they think you are,” she explained. “That was always really bothersome to me.”
She added, “I know that my behavior was so strange that people were just trying to grasp at straws for what was wrong.”
While on drugs, Bynes decided to retire from acting at the age of 24 after attending a screenplay for Easy A.
She explained, “I was high on marijuana when I saw that but for some reason it really started to affect me. I don’t know if it was a drug-induced psychosis or what, but it affected my brain in a different way than it affects other people. It absolutely changed my perception of things.”
Bynes is now looking to reenter the industry “kind of the same way I did as a kid, which is with excitement and hope for the best.”
She added, “I have no fear of the future. I’ve been through the worst and came out the other end and survived it so I just feel like it’s only up from here.”
Since Bynes made her announcement, fans have gone crazy with excitement at her revelations.
Bynes’ last movie came out in 2010.